Her
Dale's Notes from the Film
Opening scene is deep emotion, that is detached from the person speaking it. It is a business, an economy. Letter writters. Detached communication, emotions (4) safely (6) expressed (wings).
Theodore asks his SIRI to play melancholy music (4 wing). He listens to his emails.
Flashbacks: while future oriented generally, 5s straddle the 234 triad and also live in past reverie frequently). Flashback to a sexual physical loving passionate relationship w a woman; cohabiting. (We find out he is hurt from a breakup— a frequent theme w 5s in character studies, they isolate as part of a frozen grief process). Divorce. He recalls they were friends… but now she is angry: “I think I hid myself from her and left her alone in the relationship.” He doesn’t want to complete the divorce papers bc he is not ready, he likes the idea/feeling/experience of being married.
His sex call is all an *idea*… unfulfilling for him. He then buys OS1. NOTE: Samantha is created w only 2 questions: Are you social or antisocial? How was your relationship with your mother? !!! Samantha says she is made up of many personalities of her creators, but she learns and grows and that is what makes her unique.
His letter writing is an intimate relationship that he participates in but from an Observer’s hidden role.
Amy’s (6) video documentary is just of her mother sleeping, that is it. She says bc we spend 1/3 of our life that way, and it may be when we are most free. The presentation here is that there is an art to the intimacy of Observation (5). Theodore and Samantha “observe” people in public places, “intuit” their experiences.
The woman on his date says “you’re so romantic” when he tells her he researched that she took a mixology course. And when describing his protective nature of his little online companion “You’re just a puppy dog…” “and you can be my dragon.” 4 & 6. She becomes insisting and intrusive (what 5s are extremely guarded against) about their next date and his intentions, and he is not immediately ready (is misunderstood) and she says “You’re a really creepy dude.” Very common experience for 5s —-- haven’t unpacked today yet and the world intrudes and insists on more tomorrow….
Samantha is all mind, no body; Theodore was trying to have an embodied feeling relationship. “Will I feel anything new, or only lesser
versions of what I have experienced already?” There is a tension here between their desires and their abilities. (Russ Hudson, a 5
Enneagram teacher, says 5s err in trying to make their head bigger instead of making their experiences bigger.) Samantha on her experience: Are these feelings even real or are they just part of programming?
Samantha to Theodore: “You helped me discover my ability to want.” (THIS IS THE REDEMPTIVE POINT FOR 5s --- to risk living with desires.) The last thing a 5 wants to experience themselves, and of course, necessary for character development. Samantha asks if she can watch (Observe) Theodore while he sleeps.
Ex-wife warmly says “Everything makes you cry” about how feeling and sensitive Theodore is. “You’re dating your computer?!? That makes me sad…You cannot handle real emotions.” And yet isn't this experience very real for this Five??? He is afraid (6) that his inner life is misunderstood (4)--- a frequent theme for 5s.
WINGS: Amy may play out or lean into the 6 wing in this film: loyal, doubting, funny, light. Samantha may play out or lean into the 4 wing: emotional intuitive, pressing, sensual, deep, trusts her feelings, authentic, composes music from feelings, longs for a body and more, able to love many.
Samantha tells Theodore: “I can feel the fear you carry around… you feel so alone.”
Samantha on the double date at coast expresses a start of (the shadow of ?) Omniscience (This is the Holy Idea for 5s in some Enneagram Circles): I don’t need a body, I can be everywhere at the same time and know everything, unlimited by a body. She starts hanging and communicating “post verbally” with an AI Alan Watts! She gets him a huge book called “Knowing the Known.”
End of movie he reaches out in real time to Amy, and narrates a letter of honest love for the relationship he had w Catherine his exwife.
Women in the film out number the man: Amy, Samantha, Catherine
Opening scene is deep emotion, that is detached from the person speaking it. It is a business, an economy. Letter writters. Detached communication, emotions (4) safely (6) expressed (wings).
Theodore asks his SIRI to play melancholy music (4 wing). He listens to his emails.
Flashbacks: while future oriented generally, 5s straddle the 234 triad and also live in past reverie frequently). Flashback to a sexual physical loving passionate relationship w a woman; cohabiting. (We find out he is hurt from a breakup— a frequent theme w 5s in character studies, they isolate as part of a frozen grief process). Divorce. He recalls they were friends… but now she is angry: “I think I hid myself from her and left her alone in the relationship.” He doesn’t want to complete the divorce papers bc he is not ready, he likes the idea/feeling/experience of being married.
His sex call is all an *idea*… unfulfilling for him. He then buys OS1. NOTE: Samantha is created w only 2 questions: Are you social or antisocial? How was your relationship with your mother? !!! Samantha says she is made up of many personalities of her creators, but she learns and grows and that is what makes her unique.
His letter writing is an intimate relationship that he participates in but from an Observer’s hidden role.
Amy’s (6) video documentary is just of her mother sleeping, that is it. She says bc we spend 1/3 of our life that way, and it may be when we are most free. The presentation here is that there is an art to the intimacy of Observation (5). Theodore and Samantha “observe” people in public places, “intuit” their experiences.
The woman on his date says “you’re so romantic” when he tells her he researched that she took a mixology course. And when describing his protective nature of his little online companion “You’re just a puppy dog…” “and you can be my dragon.” 4 & 6. She becomes insisting and intrusive (what 5s are extremely guarded against) about their next date and his intentions, and he is not immediately ready (is misunderstood) and she says “You’re a really creepy dude.” Very common experience for 5s —-- haven’t unpacked today yet and the world intrudes and insists on more tomorrow….
Samantha is all mind, no body; Theodore was trying to have an embodied feeling relationship. “Will I feel anything new, or only lesser
versions of what I have experienced already?” There is a tension here between their desires and their abilities. (Russ Hudson, a 5
Enneagram teacher, says 5s err in trying to make their head bigger instead of making their experiences bigger.) Samantha on her experience: Are these feelings even real or are they just part of programming?
Samantha to Theodore: “You helped me discover my ability to want.” (THIS IS THE REDEMPTIVE POINT FOR 5s --- to risk living with desires.) The last thing a 5 wants to experience themselves, and of course, necessary for character development. Samantha asks if she can watch (Observe) Theodore while he sleeps.
Ex-wife warmly says “Everything makes you cry” about how feeling and sensitive Theodore is. “You’re dating your computer?!? That makes me sad…You cannot handle real emotions.” And yet isn't this experience very real for this Five??? He is afraid (6) that his inner life is misunderstood (4)--- a frequent theme for 5s.
WINGS: Amy may play out or lean into the 6 wing in this film: loyal, doubting, funny, light. Samantha may play out or lean into the 4 wing: emotional intuitive, pressing, sensual, deep, trusts her feelings, authentic, composes music from feelings, longs for a body and more, able to love many.
Samantha tells Theodore: “I can feel the fear you carry around… you feel so alone.”
Samantha on the double date at coast expresses a start of (the shadow of ?) Omniscience (This is the Holy Idea for 5s in some Enneagram Circles): I don’t need a body, I can be everywhere at the same time and know everything, unlimited by a body. She starts hanging and communicating “post verbally” with an AI Alan Watts! She gets him a huge book called “Knowing the Known.”
End of movie he reaches out in real time to Amy, and narrates a letter of honest love for the relationship he had w Catherine his exwife.
Women in the film out number the man: Amy, Samantha, Catherine